Full of intention

New Year's Resolution: a tradition, most common in the Western World but also found in the Eastern World, in which a person resolves to continue good practices, change an undesired trait or behavior, accomplish a personal goal, or otherwise improve their behavior at the beginning of a calendar year (Wikipedia). Sounds nice, right? Then why does everyone quit two weeks later and then hate themselves for the next 11.5 months?

Humans were not designed to be perfect; we aren't robots, which is why they might be coming for our jobs, but that's a topic for another day. We are, by nature, flawed. It's part of what makes us interesting. And in a world where we are constantly comparing ourselves to strangers on the internet who appear to have their lives in order, we set unrealistic expectations like quitting all white foods cold turkey without allowing the occasional indulgence. Then all it takes is one bad day for everything to come crashing down. Our dog runs away, or we get passed up for a promotion, and suddenly it's a double-stacked mashed potato sandwich on white bread with four slices of cheese in the middle and a McFlurry to wash it all down. Then comes the self-loathing.

Three years ago, I was fresh out of amputation surgery, and if anyone dared to ask what my New Year's Resolution was, I just glared at them and told them to go to the bad place. Two Years ago, my Dad had just passed, and I wasn't talking to anyone outside of my small bubble so that I wouldn't have to tell them to go to the bad place, and last year, I just got a stomach ache anytime someone asked.

This year, I'm trying something different. I'm choosing to set intentions instead of resolutions. I’m asking, what do I want for myself? How can I send that energy out into the universe in a way that will help me get there without guilt or pressure? I’m focusing on the end goal and using it as motivation to put in the work; I’m giving myself gratitude and grace as I push toward it. Improving oneself doesn’t mean that who you are now isn’t enough. It’s simply growth; if we’re lucky, we will grow until our final days on earth, learning and soaking up all that life has to offer.

Remember you are capable of anything if you cheer yourself on instead of tearing yourself down. Here’s to more great intentions, growth, grace, and self-love.